How to write cleanly even if my character uses expletive language?Using expletives in an essayHow to master...
Dot in front of file
How to deal with a cynical class?
Does splitting a potentially monolithic application into several smaller ones help prevent bugs?
Possible Leak In Concrete
In-house repeater?
Where is the 1/8 CR apprentice in Volo's Guide to Monsters?
Official degrees of earth’s rotation per day
Bash replace string at multiple places in a file from command line
Why must traveling waves have the same amplitude to form a standing wave?
Instead of Universal Basic Income, why not Universal Basic NEEDS?
How is the Swiss post e-voting system supposed to work, and how was it wrong?
Using "wallow" verb with object
Is a lawful good "antagonist" effective?
How to write cleanly even if my character uses expletive language?
Am I not good enough for you?
Can hydraulic brake levers get hot when brakes overheat?
What is a good source for large tables on the properties of water?
Why would a flight no longer considered airworthy be redirected like this?
Rules about breaking the rules. How do I do it well?
Replacing Windows 7 security updates with anti-virus?
Do I need life insurance if I can cover my own funeral costs?
Is it possible that AIC = BIC?
Making a sword in the stone, in a medieval world without magic
Schematic conventions for different supply rails
How to write cleanly even if my character uses expletive language?
Using expletives in an essayHow to master literary American English as a second language?conversation language translationCan a foreign language novel have English character names?What font should I use to write alien language?How to write long extracts in a foreign language?What language should I write my programming blog post in?How to write dialogue for someone who is intelligent but barely speaks the language?How do I indicate that my character is speaking a different language than the one used for narration?How to interpret a language from a non-speaker's perspective?British / American language mishmash
I'm writing a story that I'd like younger readers to pick up. I and they know and understand that some situations are far better expressed with one f-word than a thousand milder ones. I'm keeping my narrative clean, but when I write the dialogue, I don't know what to do.
Should I:
- describe, as in:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. Charlie exploded with profanity that pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
- or should I use made-up terms, such as
frak
from Battlestar Galactica:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. "FRAK" Charlie exploded. The eruption pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
also, I could use a milder word like
crap
,shoot
, and the likes.Alternatively, I could replace with a place holder, as in:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. "< EXPLETIVE >" Charlie exploded. The eruption pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
Note
I've read answers like this one ("you have to eat before you [deficate]".) But that waters down the expression a lot for what I want.
technique language profanity
New contributor
add a comment |
I'm writing a story that I'd like younger readers to pick up. I and they know and understand that some situations are far better expressed with one f-word than a thousand milder ones. I'm keeping my narrative clean, but when I write the dialogue, I don't know what to do.
Should I:
- describe, as in:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. Charlie exploded with profanity that pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
- or should I use made-up terms, such as
frak
from Battlestar Galactica:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. "FRAK" Charlie exploded. The eruption pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
also, I could use a milder word like
crap
,shoot
, and the likes.Alternatively, I could replace with a place holder, as in:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. "< EXPLETIVE >" Charlie exploded. The eruption pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
Note
I've read answers like this one ("you have to eat before you [deficate]".) But that waters down the expression a lot for what I want.
technique language profanity
New contributor
2
Number one. Use your first choice.
– DPT
1 hour ago
In every situation? do you think I could work that in? The above is just an example. In fact, there is no door slamming in this story, yet.
– mbadawi23
59 mins ago
Write it, and keep looking around for additional ways to communicate it. "He yelled an expletive, and his mother said, "Grounded. no F-bombs under my roof." Keep at it. That's the nature of the game.
– DPT
38 mins ago
add a comment |
I'm writing a story that I'd like younger readers to pick up. I and they know and understand that some situations are far better expressed with one f-word than a thousand milder ones. I'm keeping my narrative clean, but when I write the dialogue, I don't know what to do.
Should I:
- describe, as in:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. Charlie exploded with profanity that pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
- or should I use made-up terms, such as
frak
from Battlestar Galactica:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. "FRAK" Charlie exploded. The eruption pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
also, I could use a milder word like
crap
,shoot
, and the likes.Alternatively, I could replace with a place holder, as in:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. "< EXPLETIVE >" Charlie exploded. The eruption pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
Note
I've read answers like this one ("you have to eat before you [deficate]".) But that waters down the expression a lot for what I want.
technique language profanity
New contributor
I'm writing a story that I'd like younger readers to pick up. I and they know and understand that some situations are far better expressed with one f-word than a thousand milder ones. I'm keeping my narrative clean, but when I write the dialogue, I don't know what to do.
Should I:
- describe, as in:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. Charlie exploded with profanity that pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
- or should I use made-up terms, such as
frak
from Battlestar Galactica:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. "FRAK" Charlie exploded. The eruption pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
also, I could use a milder word like
crap
,shoot
, and the likes.Alternatively, I could replace with a place holder, as in:
Tommy slammed the door on Charlie's fingers. "< EXPLETIVE >" Charlie exploded. The eruption pierced their mother's ears downstairs.
Note
I've read answers like this one ("you have to eat before you [deficate]".) But that waters down the expression a lot for what I want.
technique language profanity
technique language profanity
New contributor
New contributor
edited 58 mins ago
mbadawi23
New contributor
asked 1 hour ago
mbadawi23mbadawi23
2867
2867
New contributor
New contributor
2
Number one. Use your first choice.
– DPT
1 hour ago
In every situation? do you think I could work that in? The above is just an example. In fact, there is no door slamming in this story, yet.
– mbadawi23
59 mins ago
Write it, and keep looking around for additional ways to communicate it. "He yelled an expletive, and his mother said, "Grounded. no F-bombs under my roof." Keep at it. That's the nature of the game.
– DPT
38 mins ago
add a comment |
2
Number one. Use your first choice.
– DPT
1 hour ago
In every situation? do you think I could work that in? The above is just an example. In fact, there is no door slamming in this story, yet.
– mbadawi23
59 mins ago
Write it, and keep looking around for additional ways to communicate it. "He yelled an expletive, and his mother said, "Grounded. no F-bombs under my roof." Keep at it. That's the nature of the game.
– DPT
38 mins ago
2
2
Number one. Use your first choice.
– DPT
1 hour ago
Number one. Use your first choice.
– DPT
1 hour ago
In every situation? do you think I could work that in? The above is just an example. In fact, there is no door slamming in this story, yet.
– mbadawi23
59 mins ago
In every situation? do you think I could work that in? The above is just an example. In fact, there is no door slamming in this story, yet.
– mbadawi23
59 mins ago
Write it, and keep looking around for additional ways to communicate it. "He yelled an expletive, and his mother said, "Grounded. no F-bombs under my roof." Keep at it. That's the nature of the game.
– DPT
38 mins ago
Write it, and keep looking around for additional ways to communicate it. "He yelled an expletive, and his mother said, "Grounded. no F-bombs under my roof." Keep at it. That's the nature of the game.
– DPT
38 mins ago
add a comment |
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
Each usage has its place.
#1 is most commonly used in such situations. Even if you're not writing for children, you don't necessarily want every bit of cursing. Sometimes telling that the character used a strong word is enough, or even more effective, than actually spelling out what exactly he said.
#2 has place when you're writing for adults, who would know what you're hiding, but you still wish to keep a cleaner tongue. This solution only makes sense in speculative fiction - not in a story set in our here-and-now.
#3 might be in character for the person doing the cursing. Some people automatically resort to the milder words - that's how they've been raised, that's their natural vocabulary. If that is the case for the particular character, feel free to use it. Make sure it matches the rest of the characterisation though.
#4 if you use that, you are throwing the reader out of the immersion in your story. You are presenting the reader with a meta element - an in-story word has been visibly blacked-out outside. Terry Pratchett used this for comedic effect, with a hardened criminal who was literally saying '--ing' all the time. This is a tool you'd want to apply very carefully though, while being aware that you are throwing the reader out of the story - only do it if this is the deliberate effect you're seeking.
add a comment |
Maybe you can use a spoonerism?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoonerism
However, I am not sure if there's any unintended effect it may have (it could make the excerpt unintentionally funny).
For example:
Instead of saying "F**k this!", your character could say: "Tuck
fhis!".
Check this example as a reference:
Similarly to the above example, "Buck Fama" is a popular slogan in the
(often contentious) rivalry between Louisiana State University and the
University of Alabama (commonly shortened to Bama). This slogan can be
heard very often from LSU fans.
add a comment |
Your Answer
StackExchange.ready(function() {
var channelOptions = {
tags: "".split(" "),
id: "166"
};
initTagRenderer("".split(" "), "".split(" "), channelOptions);
StackExchange.using("externalEditor", function() {
// Have to fire editor after snippets, if snippets enabled
if (StackExchange.settings.snippets.snippetsEnabled) {
StackExchange.using("snippets", function() {
createEditor();
});
}
else {
createEditor();
}
});
function createEditor() {
StackExchange.prepareEditor({
heartbeatType: 'answer',
autoActivateHeartbeat: false,
convertImagesToLinks: false,
noModals: true,
showLowRepImageUploadWarning: true,
reputationToPostImages: null,
bindNavPrevention: true,
postfix: "",
imageUploader: {
brandingHtml: "Powered by u003ca class="icon-imgur-white" href="https://imgur.com/"u003eu003c/au003e",
contentPolicyHtml: "User contributions licensed under u003ca href="https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/"u003ecc by-sa 3.0 with attribution requiredu003c/au003e u003ca href="https://stackoverflow.com/legal/content-policy"u003e(content policy)u003c/au003e",
allowUrls: true
},
noCode: true, onDemand: true,
discardSelector: ".discard-answer"
,immediatelyShowMarkdownHelp:true
});
}
});
mbadawi23 is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
StackExchange.ready(
function () {
StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fwriting.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f43540%2fhow-to-write-cleanly-even-if-my-character-uses-expletive-language%23new-answer', 'question_page');
}
);
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
Each usage has its place.
#1 is most commonly used in such situations. Even if you're not writing for children, you don't necessarily want every bit of cursing. Sometimes telling that the character used a strong word is enough, or even more effective, than actually spelling out what exactly he said.
#2 has place when you're writing for adults, who would know what you're hiding, but you still wish to keep a cleaner tongue. This solution only makes sense in speculative fiction - not in a story set in our here-and-now.
#3 might be in character for the person doing the cursing. Some people automatically resort to the milder words - that's how they've been raised, that's their natural vocabulary. If that is the case for the particular character, feel free to use it. Make sure it matches the rest of the characterisation though.
#4 if you use that, you are throwing the reader out of the immersion in your story. You are presenting the reader with a meta element - an in-story word has been visibly blacked-out outside. Terry Pratchett used this for comedic effect, with a hardened criminal who was literally saying '--ing' all the time. This is a tool you'd want to apply very carefully though, while being aware that you are throwing the reader out of the story - only do it if this is the deliberate effect you're seeking.
add a comment |
Each usage has its place.
#1 is most commonly used in such situations. Even if you're not writing for children, you don't necessarily want every bit of cursing. Sometimes telling that the character used a strong word is enough, or even more effective, than actually spelling out what exactly he said.
#2 has place when you're writing for adults, who would know what you're hiding, but you still wish to keep a cleaner tongue. This solution only makes sense in speculative fiction - not in a story set in our here-and-now.
#3 might be in character for the person doing the cursing. Some people automatically resort to the milder words - that's how they've been raised, that's their natural vocabulary. If that is the case for the particular character, feel free to use it. Make sure it matches the rest of the characterisation though.
#4 if you use that, you are throwing the reader out of the immersion in your story. You are presenting the reader with a meta element - an in-story word has been visibly blacked-out outside. Terry Pratchett used this for comedic effect, with a hardened criminal who was literally saying '--ing' all the time. This is a tool you'd want to apply very carefully though, while being aware that you are throwing the reader out of the story - only do it if this is the deliberate effect you're seeking.
add a comment |
Each usage has its place.
#1 is most commonly used in such situations. Even if you're not writing for children, you don't necessarily want every bit of cursing. Sometimes telling that the character used a strong word is enough, or even more effective, than actually spelling out what exactly he said.
#2 has place when you're writing for adults, who would know what you're hiding, but you still wish to keep a cleaner tongue. This solution only makes sense in speculative fiction - not in a story set in our here-and-now.
#3 might be in character for the person doing the cursing. Some people automatically resort to the milder words - that's how they've been raised, that's their natural vocabulary. If that is the case for the particular character, feel free to use it. Make sure it matches the rest of the characterisation though.
#4 if you use that, you are throwing the reader out of the immersion in your story. You are presenting the reader with a meta element - an in-story word has been visibly blacked-out outside. Terry Pratchett used this for comedic effect, with a hardened criminal who was literally saying '--ing' all the time. This is a tool you'd want to apply very carefully though, while being aware that you are throwing the reader out of the story - only do it if this is the deliberate effect you're seeking.
Each usage has its place.
#1 is most commonly used in such situations. Even if you're not writing for children, you don't necessarily want every bit of cursing. Sometimes telling that the character used a strong word is enough, or even more effective, than actually spelling out what exactly he said.
#2 has place when you're writing for adults, who would know what you're hiding, but you still wish to keep a cleaner tongue. This solution only makes sense in speculative fiction - not in a story set in our here-and-now.
#3 might be in character for the person doing the cursing. Some people automatically resort to the milder words - that's how they've been raised, that's their natural vocabulary. If that is the case for the particular character, feel free to use it. Make sure it matches the rest of the characterisation though.
#4 if you use that, you are throwing the reader out of the immersion in your story. You are presenting the reader with a meta element - an in-story word has been visibly blacked-out outside. Terry Pratchett used this for comedic effect, with a hardened criminal who was literally saying '--ing' all the time. This is a tool you'd want to apply very carefully though, while being aware that you are throwing the reader out of the story - only do it if this is the deliberate effect you're seeking.
answered 47 mins ago
GalastelGalastel
35.8k6107191
35.8k6107191
add a comment |
add a comment |
Maybe you can use a spoonerism?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoonerism
However, I am not sure if there's any unintended effect it may have (it could make the excerpt unintentionally funny).
For example:
Instead of saying "F**k this!", your character could say: "Tuck
fhis!".
Check this example as a reference:
Similarly to the above example, "Buck Fama" is a popular slogan in the
(often contentious) rivalry between Louisiana State University and the
University of Alabama (commonly shortened to Bama). This slogan can be
heard very often from LSU fans.
add a comment |
Maybe you can use a spoonerism?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoonerism
However, I am not sure if there's any unintended effect it may have (it could make the excerpt unintentionally funny).
For example:
Instead of saying "F**k this!", your character could say: "Tuck
fhis!".
Check this example as a reference:
Similarly to the above example, "Buck Fama" is a popular slogan in the
(often contentious) rivalry between Louisiana State University and the
University of Alabama (commonly shortened to Bama). This slogan can be
heard very often from LSU fans.
add a comment |
Maybe you can use a spoonerism?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoonerism
However, I am not sure if there's any unintended effect it may have (it could make the excerpt unintentionally funny).
For example:
Instead of saying "F**k this!", your character could say: "Tuck
fhis!".
Check this example as a reference:
Similarly to the above example, "Buck Fama" is a popular slogan in the
(often contentious) rivalry between Louisiana State University and the
University of Alabama (commonly shortened to Bama). This slogan can be
heard very often from LSU fans.
Maybe you can use a spoonerism?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spoonerism
However, I am not sure if there's any unintended effect it may have (it could make the excerpt unintentionally funny).
For example:
Instead of saying "F**k this!", your character could say: "Tuck
fhis!".
Check this example as a reference:
Similarly to the above example, "Buck Fama" is a popular slogan in the
(often contentious) rivalry between Louisiana State University and the
University of Alabama (commonly shortened to Bama). This slogan can be
heard very often from LSU fans.
answered 37 mins ago
repomonsterrepomonster
2,0741135
2,0741135
add a comment |
add a comment |
mbadawi23 is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
mbadawi23 is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
mbadawi23 is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
mbadawi23 is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
Thanks for contributing an answer to Writing Stack Exchange!
- Please be sure to answer the question. Provide details and share your research!
But avoid …
- Asking for help, clarification, or responding to other answers.
- Making statements based on opinion; back them up with references or personal experience.
To learn more, see our tips on writing great answers.
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
StackExchange.ready(
function () {
StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fwriting.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f43540%2fhow-to-write-cleanly-even-if-my-character-uses-expletive-language%23new-answer', 'question_page');
}
);
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Sign up or log in
StackExchange.ready(function () {
StackExchange.helpers.onClickDraftSave('#login-link');
});
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Sign up using Google
Sign up using Facebook
Sign up using Email and Password
Post as a guest
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
Required, but never shown
2
Number one. Use your first choice.
– DPT
1 hour ago
In every situation? do you think I could work that in? The above is just an example. In fact, there is no door slamming in this story, yet.
– mbadawi23
59 mins ago
Write it, and keep looking around for additional ways to communicate it. "He yelled an expletive, and his mother said, "Grounded. no F-bombs under my roof." Keep at it. That's the nature of the game.
– DPT
38 mins ago